It happened during the walk to BAE yesterday morning. It might have been because of the thought of this being the last week of the TEFL program, and getting certified today. Or it might have been because of the impending return to Buffalo next Tuesday, and how fast time has gone by. Whatever the cause, it was completely unexpected, and yet quite unsurprising. Out of nowhere, the thought came to me: “I can’t wait to go home.”
Yes, I dreaded going home because the thought of being with my family was — and still is — inconceivable, but now I know it really doesn’t matter. Because like it or not, they’re my family, and come hell or high water I will deal with them just like I dealt with all my other problems. And now that the TEFL program is over, and I know there’s nothing left for me in this country, I’m ready to fly hell for leather out of here and actually do something with what I’ve gotten out of my time in the program, even if it means doing it back home.
I’ve finally learned how to let go.