OK you can stop looking now

“I hate it when they have like three people in the room. I mean, how many people do you actually need to look into your vag?” — Maddi

After today, three more people on this planet know that I go for Brazilian waxes.

At long last the damn twice-rescheduled colposcopy is done. Was little more than a pap smear, but rather more uncomfortable, as the speculum was left there for much longer and was well aware of a microscope being moved around the cervix. Also felt weird to have three people looking into the microscope: the resident actually performing the colposcopy, her supervising doctor, and her assistant. The good news is that there doesn’t seem to be any serious abnormality (“Everything looks good!” was the supervising doctor’s proclamation after spending a considerable amount of time with his eye fixed to the microscope); the bad news was that they decided to do a ‘random biopsy’ anyway, just in case am teetering on the edge of getting cervical cancer, so am now left with a tiny hole on the cervix which will bleed for the next couple of days and the impression of what period cramps must feel like. Yes, have never in all born days experienced period cramps, although Shirley is convinced that upon turning 28 the cramps will descend upon self.

Thanksgiving Break begins on Wednesday. Was initially supposed to visit Angie in Minneapolis this week, and had actually planned to leave today and stay until Friday, but then upon remembering the colposcopy had to put it off, after which discovered that leaving tomorrow would cost about $100 more, so that idea’s gone out the window. Then had talked about going to Manhattan with Su Yen, but as she just started working she has yet to sort out her finances, so that ship has sailed too. So am doomed to stay in Buffalo for Thanksgiving, for the first time ever, which isn’t so bad if the friends are here.

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