Code Red

I’ve done it again. Once again I’ve set myself up for the equivalent of a plane crash, and now I’m left to pick up the pieces on my own. And once again, I have absolutely nobody to blame but myself, because I chose to stay in the plane, and I chose to face the pain and the humiliation in the hopes that in the end everything would turn out all right. It might not be so bad though, because it was a long time coming.

They were right. They were all right. They all knew this was headed for disaster, and they all tried to warn me. But I ignored their advice, choosing instead to stick to what I wanted to believe in, to what I had believed in right from the very beginning, yet all the while knowing in the back of my mind that they were right. But now that the truth of it has been forced in my face, I just need to lift my chin and go through it with what little dignity I have left.

If only it didn’t hurt so damn much.

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