Today I received a call from a friend badgering me about whether or not I will be attending her wedding, so that she would know to print a proper invitation and have it mailed to my house. Setting aside the fact that I was already in a foul temper because of work and in no mood to talk about inane things like weddings, I swiftly informed her that she would not have to worry about mailing me an invitation, as I am not in support of physical (i.e. paper or other materials) invitations.
Upon hearing that, she wailed, “Eh, pai kua la!” (“It’s unseemly!”) I firmly repeated that she should not print an invitation for me, and merely tell me when and where via SMS, just in case I get bored and decide to go. Her next response further irritated me: “But I have people telling me that if they don’t receive an invitation in the mail, it’s very pai kua, and they wouldn’t attend.”
My temper already nearing catatonic levels, I swallowed the violent urge to scream, “WHO THE FUCK CARES? IT’S JUST A FUCKING WEDDING AND YOU HAVE FUCKING STUPID RETARDED FRIENDS!” But again, I calmly stated that I would be quite all right with just a text message. No point letting one appear in the mail only to have it end up in the trash as soon as it gets into the house.
I agree that it was harsh and probably uncalled for, but I have had it up to here with all the wedding-generated fuss I have been surrounded by of late. But I stand firm when I say I do not condone physical wedding invitations, as they are a waste of paper and money, and are almost always guaranteed to end up in the trash once the information contained within has been stored in the recipients’ cell phones, or if the recipients renege on their RSVPs and fail to show up on the miserable day. I also realize that this could pose quite the dilemma if I lose my own I-don’t-want-a-wedding battle, because I would end up torn between sending a Facebook invitation and a physical invitation, and how on earth does one choose between Tacky and Wasteful?